Yesterday I was in my room and heard Wyatt talking to somebody. I got a little closer without him seeing me and heard him saying, "Santa don't watch me!" and again, "Santa, don't ever never watch me!" As I got closer and looked into the room, he was looking up to the ceiling talking to Santa. Also he was perched on the back of the couch about to jump off! He wanted a minute to be naughty I guess! Too funny!
Everyone keeps asking how I am doing and how I am feeling and when the next treatment is. I am doing really really well! I think my attitude has totally been uplifted since the dinner on Friday! It was just amazing to see all the friends and family supporting me! I will be thinking and looking back on this forever! I'll be honest and say I've lost a bit of sleep thinking about all that transpired that night! It was like a dream and couldn't have been more perfect.
I am still of course having side effects from treatment, but this time seem so much more bearable. I'm sure I've mentioned the book I am reading before (it's taken me like 9 months to read 3/4 of the book). It's called Love, Medicine and Miracles by Bernie S. Siegel, M.D. It's Lessons learned about self-healing from a surgeon's experience with exceptional patients. The day that Dr. Bentz told me he couldn't help me surgically anymore, he gave this to me. It has been the most inspiring book ever! I think it has taken me so long to read it because a little at a time goes a long way. I read a little bit and go off of that amount of help for a couple weeks. I'll tell you, every time I pick up this book, my whole attitude changes about my treatments and my cancer. I reccommend this book to anyone who has cancer or any other disease, or just for anyone who wants a more meaningful experience when it comes to healing your own body! It's a lot about mind over matter.
Anyway, last week while waiting for an appointment with Dr. Akerley, I was reading and read a part about hair falling out and if you meditate and think about your head as ice, it will stop. Well, at that point I was starting to freak out because the past few days my hair was falling out by the hundreds (big clumps)! So, immediately I wanted to try it out. Needless to say, I have lost no more than 10-20 hairs a day since that day, although I have been envisioning my head being concrete and not letting any more hair fall out! I can't believe it worked! I am now a believer.
I stopped complaining and even apologized to Justin for voicing my complaints about my hair. What a difference in my attitude.
At that same appointment with Dr. Akerley, he told me that I have finished two rounds of treatment and that I was done doing treatment! I was a little shocked because when I talked with Joan (my NP in charge of the IL-II) she had told me that 3 rounds was the maximum. I totally expected to do the maximum. Dr. Akerley set up an appointment to do a PET/CT on April 8 and then we would go from there. He also said that he is about 100% sure I will not be doing further treatment (meaning my scan would come back clear!) I guess I now have major reason to hope and believe him! I asked if there is some residual cancer left if I can do another round of treatment. He said we will talk about it when we get the results. Till then I guess. Hopefully I will have some fun pictures to post soon of the kids and some from dinner the other night. There are pics on the benefit site I posted in my "wow" post.